New York – When downsizing apartments in a busy city like New York, a logical person may rent a storage unit for their extra furniture. if you’re less logical or on the poorer side, Facebook marketplace could be the move.
An essential part of being a Facebook marketplace shopper is a car or some means of transporting the items. Lugging a dresser on the F train might get you thrown in jail. At best, you’re ruining someone’s commute and everyone on the train is sending a screenshot of you to their group thread with a “subway creature” caption. You’re already risking enough meeting a sketchy guy in Flatbush for that dresser. Do you really need $50 that bad?
Yes, you do. And you know that talking the tight rope of logic is an excellent source for comedy. When I couldn’t find anyone with a car willing to pay for a dresser that I repaired with a stapler, I took matters into my own hands. The painfully chill college dropout from Oregon who’d sent 15 messages on the dresser is more appealing when your lease is up in three days.
He paid $60 with the delivery fee we loosely agreed to. Buyers love to take an extra $10 off the top so try to handle the negotiation on the front end. Oregon dropout looked eerily similar to Duke from Semi-Pro and didn’t drive a hard bargain:
1 down, several to go. After a few splinters, I’m left weighing the legwork of being responsive to get deals done on my remaining items. The bed frame is a criminally low 60% discount on the purchase price but getting no attention cause its not photogenic. the couch isn’t photogenic either but at $20 several Murray Hill girls without couches asked me to drive it to their door.
One guy offered $5 for the couch. I felt insulted on behalf of the couch, but also not photogenic. It treated me well, I let it have a proper couch ending on Kane St in Cobble Hill.
Really leaned on versatile in the adjectives, as each of these items I used in dining and living areas. Facebook will publish the initial price estimate you put in there. Even though they say you can change it anytime, you’ll have the crossed out first figure. No one is believing that deal.
Last key is to check the box to not show your friends. Hearing a buddy ask how things are going selling that “Versatile Dining Room Bench” is a quick way to also hear about all the ways he’s doing better thank you. He’ll say his wife saw it, how he’s so busy at the office he doesn’t even check social media. “I just don’t have time” he will say, “I don’t know how you can find time to sell stocks and living room furniture.”
The bench did ultimately sell in 2 hours, and the set of three chairs I was able to keep one as she wasn’t able to carry all four or have room. Other chair carrying disasters have endured a similar fate
In the end, definitely sell what you can and vet your marketplace customers. Check that profile make sure they seem to be a real person. Plenty of scammers out there and aggressive weirdos.
Tell me your marketplace tales in the comments.
-wack crowens